I watched Heather Armstrong (of Dooce) on Nightline last night. First, I want to say that Heather was wonderful. Second, I can’t believe so many people HATE Mom’s who blog. I’m feeling the need to clearly communicate my opinion on this issue since I am part of this new crowd.
Criticism #1
“If you hate being a mother so much why are you one?”
Okay, lets make something clear. I don’t hate being a mother. As a matter of fact I LOVE being a mother and if you read most Mom blogs for long you will realize this about almost all of them. Sure we might complain about getting poop under our fingernails but who wouldn’t? Really, do you know somebody who LIKES poop under their fingernails? We might complain about our three year old asking “Why” 500 times in a day but again, isn’t that a form of torture in some countries? EVERY job, even ones you get paid for, have aspects that you don’t like. I love being a mother but I don’t LOVE every aspect of it.
Criticism #2
“You do this because you are narcissistic and want all the attention on you.”
This is odd to me. I spend my time writing about the wonderfully funny, delightful, and sometimes annoying things my FAMILY does and that makes ME narcissistic? Here is the deal. I’m a SAHM. My only adult-interaction is when the UPS man comes and lately he’s been “dropping and running”. My blog allows me to have a virtual conversation with a virtual adult. Sometimes those virtual adults talk back. And oh, it is so nice to read sentences with big words and complete thoughts.
Criticism #3
“You are violating your family’s privacy, especially your children who will grow to resent you.”
You are right, my children are going to resent me. But, they are going to resent me whether I’m blogging or not and here is a surprise, YOUR children are going to resent YOU too. Why? because that is nature. Everybody resents their parents at some point regardless of what they do or don’t do. I do have boundaries. What they are is none of your business but I can assure you that not EVERYTHING makes it on my blog and most of what happens stays at home. A good writer does not need a lot of material to write several paragraphs a day.
Criticism #4
“You are putting your kids in danger”
I’m going to steal Dooce‘s answer to this question:
Finally, I’m proud of having done this. This started as a way to document the wonderful and funny things that go on in my life as a mother and it has evolved. It is a creative outlet, it is a great way to connect with other mother’s and I’m proud of what I’ve done. Some women knit, I write.“Am I endangering you by posting pictures of you? Many people think so, but then they’d have to admit that when I take you to the grocery store I am exposing your face to hundreds of strangers, people who can see what car we drove up in, the license plate number, and the direction we head home. Maybe we shouldn’t ever leave the house, otherwise? STRANGERS WILL KNOW WHAT WE LOOK LIKE.”
This is spot on! Fabulous post!
Hear Hear!…I love reading about Mom’s and their kid’s antics. It brings memories back to me and they’re FUNNY! While I’m not mecessarily a “Dooce” fan, I do like other blogs that feature Mums and their kids.
Keep up the good work!
The reality is everyone has a story to tell and some choose to do so and most do not. Your life is pretty typical and the fascinating thing is that the more you become like everybody else the more interesting you become because everyone can relate to you and understand exactly what you are experiencing. I don’t think you need to defend yourself for the life you have chosen, because being a mom is perhaps the most important job in the world — unfortunately the pay isn’t too good but the rewards are great — mostly later though.