I feel that part of my responsibility as a female blogger is to bring clarity into the world of marital communication. As most married persons are aware, good, clear, frequent communication is essential to a happy marriage. As a result I would like to discuss the concept of “time” and how it works within a marriage.

#1 “Honey, would you mind changing the child’s diaper”
Husbands, you have approximately 10 minutes to begin this task. More than likely said child is sending out a stench that would make grown men weep or is carrying so much fluid between their legs that more than a diaper change will be required if more time is wasted. If you fail to begin this task within 10 minutes your wife will assume you are ignoring her and/or deciding to not do her this favor.

#2 “Babe, could you empty the garbage?”
This one is tricky since this request needs to be taken into context with other events. Are you expecting guests to arrive? If this is the case then she expects you to have this task completed prior to their arrival. Is the garbage man on his way? Then you better get it out to the curb before she hears the truck. If there are no extenuating circumstances than you probably have 20-30 minutes before she is going to think you are ignoring her.

#3 “Do you think you could get me “x” item down from attic/cupboard/high shelf?”
Unless she specifies a time she needs this item NOW. Do not wait for a commercial break, for you to reach the end of the internet or to go to the bathroom. More than likely she is in the middle of doing something and needs said item immediately. She’s only asking you because you are taller than she is. This is also true for the “Can you open” or the “Can you unscrew” requests.

#4 “Could you run to the store and get me …..”
This must also be taken into context. Is she baking a cake and has only now realized she’s out of sugar? In which case you better high-tale it out of the house and to the store. Is your normally diapered child running around naked? Well, in this case it depends on your tolerance for urine on your floor. More than likely you have anywhere between 5-15 minutes to start this task before an argument will ensue.

The important thing to remember is that all of these tasks are things that she WOULD do if she could. However, for whatever reason she can not, at that moment, do them. She is throwing out a distress signal to her teammate, she is ‘tagging’ you in to the ring. If you were in the middle of a wrestling match you wouldn’t tell Hulk Hogan “hold on a second honey I want to download the new Maroon 5 album” and so the same excuse should not be used with your wife. She is asking for help, at that moment, right now. If none of these circumstance apply to your particular situation than I would stick with no more than 30 minutes. Once 30 minutest have passed said request then nagging will ensue; “don’t forget the garbage babe.” “Babe, remember the garbage?” “Honey, the garbage. Now” You get the idea.

I’m glad I can serve you like this and bring clarity and harmony to your relationships.