I’ve been thinking a lot about food lately. It is the new year and we are all full of resolutions for getting healthy, losing weight, blah, blah, blah. I’ve always been a small eater and have never really needed to watch my weight. I’m not naturally skinny, but at 38 and with 2 kids under my belt I’m only 15lbs away from my target size. I guess that doesn’t seem all that bad. David, however, has always struggled with his weight. And now, that we have kids it presses on his mind. He worries that they will follow in his footsteps and seeing how he struggles, I suppose it worries me too.

Lucy is also a small eater. She has never eaten a lot, even as an infant. She nibbles and pokes and is picky. She is not adventurous with her eating habits, but then again, she is a girl who likes routine. Lucy would eat, and sometimes does eat, the same thing every day. I refuse to make my dinner table a battleground and so there are nights when she may only eat strawberries or toast. The pediatricians tell me not to worry, and that she is getting all the nutrition she needs. How do you teach a 5 year old good eating habits when she doesn’t eat? How do you fight against your maternal extinct to want to see food go down their throats and making sure they eat their vegetables? Is it better that she eat a piece of toast, some strawberries and a popsicle then nothing? Is she better off eating a waffle for breakfast than just drinking a glass of milk? Should I give her the chicken nuggets for lunch or let her ignore the turkey sandwich I made?

There are so many challenges in parenthood and you don’t really know if you’ve navigated them successfully until your kids are adults. How will I know if I’m doing the right thing? How as a mother do you balance the dietary expectations of society, and the dietary desires of your child? Am I over-thinking a really simple problem? Am I the only mother who feels like so much of her time is dedicated to what is being eaten and not eaten? I’ve read the books, and the articles, and the experts and the blah, blah, blah. If there is one issue that there is no shortage of expert opinions it is the eating habits of children. And I’m sick of expert opinions. Does anybody’s child fall neatly into the descriptions outlined by experts?

Personally, this is one of the most challenging problems of parenthood. Between the images presented in the media, the articles and pressure of societal expectations, genetic dispositions, family traditions and my own hang-ups its a miracle the whole family hasn’t either become binge eaters or closet anorexics. Asking me about the eating habits of my kids will almost certainly send me off either in tears or hyperventilating. Does anybody else feel so completely conflicted and challenged by this issue? And please, for all that is good and holy in this world do NOT send me another article about childhood obesity rates.